This is what I would have said if I were the bartender. That actual bartender was much nicer.


The "can they be swayed" question is by far the one I get asked the most about my lesbian friends.


I've actually used all three responses, even the last one. Nobody has even noticed.


SassyGirl knows me very well.


She didn't notice my new glasses either, but I wasn't really expecting that.


The hosts had a bunch of imports they were trying to get rid of.


This was funnier in real life. I took his mug from him and wouldn't give it back. The host had to go upstairs and get Eric an unfrosted glass.


This one is really stupid. I was bored.


I should have really said this to them, but I wasn't sure if they have a sense of humor or not.


Give me a break. I didn't even know her name yet.


It was actually more like the coat that Neo wore in The Matrix.


This is sort of a response to a private message I got. Stuff like this drives me crazy.


It wasn't so much that we had to work. It was that I just knew that things would go wrong and it would take much longer than envisioned.


He didn't really say this, but it would have been funny if he had.


The truth is - she dreamed about me and a specific woman that we work with.


Sometimes I wish I was really this mean, but I'm not.


He's fat too, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings.


That hair doesn't really match EwokGirl's at all. It's the best I could do though.


My first attempt at using characters with, um, character. I'm not sure I like it. They take up a lot of space. We'll see.


I think I look fat in this one.