Hooray! Tonight the human gave us CANNED cat food!

What a special treat! We got "Savory Duck with Egg" and it was as good as ever!

I couldn't help but notice, however, that Nugget was as usual scared of the canned food. He didn't eat any of it. Buddy ended up eating Nugget's portion.

I'm worried that Nugget will starve if he doesn't get over his fear of canned food.

Something is terribly wrong with the world. The food bowl in the kitchen is empty once again.

The food bowl used to never be empty. Now the human only puts a little bit of food in it twice a day. How am I (forget Buddy and Nugget) supposed to survive by only eating twice a day?

The human keeps saying the word "diet" when he looks at me. What does this "diet" word mean? I'm not familiar with it. Buddy thinks that it means that the human thinks I'm too fat, and that this "diet" thing is supposed to make me skinny.

So what if I'm a little on the big side? It's not like I've got anyone here to impress.

Today the human played a mean joke. He brought The Cage of Doom in from the garage!

The last time we saw The Cage was a week ago when it had the crotch-biting kitten in it, and we all thought he had brought the little vermin back!

Nugget took off running for the basement, and I was just about to go down there anyway so I joined him.

The Cage of Doom turned out to be empty, so after a while Nugget (that scardy!) went back upstairs. I felt like going up there so I did.

That was not a very funny joke to play on Nugget!

I don't think I'm being irrational here. All I want is for the human to clean the litterbox within 10 seconds of any cat using it.

Heck, I'll even give him a full minute if he's busy putting out cat food.

It's bad enough that I have to do my business with Nugget sitting there staring at me all the time. Having to step around Happy and Nugget's piles is just too much.

I don't know why the human keeps butting into my business.

Every time my rear end gets even a little bit of poop caught in the matted fur he grabs me and puts me in the water!

Now I like to drink water. I like to watch water fall from the faucet, and I even like to dip my paw in water sometimes. What I do not like is to have my rear end submerged in the stuff.

To make matters worse, the human doesn't just get me all wet. He also takes a comb and scissors and starts poking at my rear end until all of the poop I was saving back there gets dislodged.

He seems to have this compulsion to keep my butt free from clinging poop. If I wanted the stuff cleaned off my butt I'd lose about 15 pounds so I could reach and clean my own butt.

Sometimes after the human eats some pizza he closes the box and puts it on the floor for a while.

I love to sit on the box and smell the pizza left inside. I can never figure out how to open the box, but smelling the pizza is almost as good as eating it.

I don't know why, but the human never lets me eat any plastic. This morning I found some new plastic in the basement trash can. I was happily spreading it around the room, stopping to snack every now and then, not causing anyone any harm, when the human comes down and picks up all the plastic and takes it upstairs.

Why won't he allow me a simple pleasure like eating plastic. He's just so mean!

Today was another scary day!

First the human came home early, and I was afraid for a bit that he was going to kill me, but then he let me drink the tap water and I settled down - but not for long.

Two other humans came over and went into the basement!

Buddy said they were there to fix the human's pool table but I know they were discussing recipes to cook me!

Luckily I was able to stay hidden in my secret place until they left.

More cheese is the last thing you need.

I like cheese. And chicken too.