Statement: The Internet access at the Rio All-Suites Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas sucks donkey balls.

Question: Which is worse, anticipation followed by disappointment, or dread followed by relief?

Question: Am I supposed to be pissed at this fucker or not?

Statement: Delerium Tremens is a very fine beer.

Question: Just how stupid do you think I am?

Statement: SURPRISE!!!

Question: Call me, will you?

Statement: Those who say that sex is overrated are either having it often enough to be jaded or having it seldom enough to have forgotten its beauty. The rest of us would never say that it's overrated.