I never do this.
I never reach out. Not to anyone.
Not when they're in need, and not when I'm in need.
And it's pretty fucking rare, pretty fucking, special maybe even fucking unprecedented that I find myself, in need, reaching out to another in need.
Wait, that's not right.
I have done this before.
It's not unprecedented. This has happened before.
In September 2005.
That time, it worked.
That time, I found myself a friend who I think will be with me as long as I live.
But this time, this time it's not working at all.
This time my arms close on emptiness.
I'll never do this again.