Anyway, there's either misdirected and probably unwarranted anger, or there's preemptive depression.
And that's it. Those are the choices that this lump of crap I keep between my ears, those are the choices that it's been presenting me with for the past week.
Well, I don't like either choice very much. I dislike those choices so much that, for the past few days, I've felt myself beginning to shut down. To keep from having to make that choice, I've begun to sever every emotional circuit within me. I don't like that very much either. In fact, shutting down sucks.
So, out of desperation, I'm inventing a third choice.
Instead of getting angry, and instead of getting sad, I will get even.
Never mind that there's nothing to exact revenge for. Not just yet anyway. Why should I let a small technicality like that stop me?
This is my sanity I'm trying to save here.