Right now, I'm sitting here feeling myself shut down. It's a familiar feeling to me. Too fucking familiar.

I see the blow that life is throwing at me, and I feel myself reflexively turn away. I might just run and hide while there's still time.

If people knew what the fuck I was rambling about this time, I know what they'd say.

"A lot can happen between now and then," they'd say.

I know this because that's exactly what I've been trying to tell myself for the past two hours.

Everybody's right, of course. I'm right.

A lot can happen. It's just that I can find little solace in that particular platitude.

I'm too busy being a selfish prick, feeling sorry for myself.