posted by dave on Tuesday, December 25, 2007 at 10:01 PM in category ramblings

Shadows are strange. A wall can cast a shadow, but so can a cloud, and the effect is the same.

Darkness.

When I was a child, all sorts of horrible creatures lurked in the shadows. But now, now I see them for what they really are.

Absence of light.

When I was a child, I recoiled from the shadows. But now, now I seek them out. I embrace them, and I thank them for what they do.

Shrouding the truth.

---

Okay, this is stupid. Not at all what I wanted to write. Too metaphorical, too cryptic.

What I wanted to say was that, right now, I don't fear the truth. And I don't even know what the fucking truth is. I think I usually fear it just on principle. But. Not. Now.

I don't want to know, but I do want to know, so badly that every breath I take is nothing but another disappointment, because I'm still in the dark. Still in this shadow. Cowering.

Don't destroy my shadow. Don't take away the obstruction that stands between me and the light. That's not what I want. What I want, what I fucking want, is to be lured from my hiding place. Coaxed. Beguiled. Seduced. Whatever.

I need to emerge willingly, I think, whether through truth or trickery. Otherwise, I fear that the shock will be too great, and my eyes will close forever.

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