me
posted by dave on Sunday, March 18, 2012 at 1:35 AM in category ramblings

I had it, for about 15 minutes tonight as I sat in my garage watching the lightning and drinking a yummy Night Tripper. I had it.

It was awesome.

I spend the bulk of my life looking for that particular mood. I see it often, but catch it seldom. Like the last pea on the plate, evading the stab of the fork. It's so hard to catch.

It's me, that's the point of the thing. It's the me that I want to be, need to be, deserve to be, am resigned to be, am fated to be.

Am.

It's so nice to be me for a while. Even though it never lasts very long. Emotions feed on themselves, a feedback loop ensues, and it becomes overwhelming. Self-defense kicks in. I hate it when that happens.

Eyes roll, and I persevere. Love and hate blur together, and I persevere. Longing and disgust fight for supremacy, and I persevere.

When I'm me, I persevere.

At other times, not so much.

I miss me.

comments (4)

For the life of the mind, intelligence is the food, and
emotion is the flavor.

The former is essential, but the latter provides
all of the fun ---

and most of the misery.

Not sure why it didn't automagically approve your comment. You're still white-listed.

W-e-l-l . . I'm "white-listed" hey. . . now I can die fulfilled! = )

I too looked into Lasik, for the same reasons/motives, but didn't see the point in subjecting my eyes to surgery only to need glasses for reading.

Instead went with blended tri-focals (you put 'em on and try and see) . . . no frame. . . and they're working out quite well.

Hmmm, it still made me approve you. Maybe it knows something I don't. Or maybe there's a missing comma in my whitelist like there was the last time.

I'm pretty happy with my lasik at this point. The monovision doesn't seem to be causing any problems. And I haven't lost enough depth perception to be a bother.

post a comment

If you haven't left a comment here before, you may need to be approved before your comment will appear. Until then, it won't appear on the entry. Thanks for waiting.

I'll pretty much approve anything except SPAM comments, or comments that clearly have no purpose except to piss me off, or comments that are insulting to a previous commenter.

Use anything you want for your name and email address. I think it has to at least look like a valid email address though.

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