I tan fast, and I fade even faster. Kind of like some other things that I can't think of right now.

Today I welcomed two old friends back into my life.

First, out of the blue, I got a text message from RealTrainGirl. She is apparently finished being pissed at me, though she denies having ever been, and wanted to see if I was going to Rich O's after work. I was, and she did too.

The second reunion of the day was in the form of NABC's Cone Smoker, back after being gone for over a year. Of course I had some.

New Albanian Cone Smoker (Second Coming)

(draft) The second brewing of this beer, this time from NABC's new brewer, has a slightly tweaked recipe. Or so I hear. Pretty good. To compare to the rauchbiers that I've had the most of lately: Slightly less bite than Spezial, slightly less smoke than NABC Noble Smoker, but could probably pass for either one. Very minimal carbonation though - a trait that's pretty common with all NABC beers.

To tell the truth, I'm not enough of a beer guru to understand the difference between this and the NABC Noble Smoker that ran in the Spring. I'm also not sure I understand the need for two such similar brews in the NABC stable. Buy hey, when it comes to rauchbiers, the more the merrier.

Also, this near-total lack of carbonation has become something of a trademark for this little brewery. I find it to be something that I just put up with, like the broken springs on the sofa and the fruit flies that surround me whenever I have a Belgian beer.

So one of my female readers helped clarify the I saw him first rule that I described the other day.

According to her, the whole female loyalty thing only affects whether a woman is going to make the first move or not. When the right guy makes the first move, all sisterhood is out the window.

This make perfect sense to me, and it also explains several of the exceptions to the rule that I've seen over the years.

Now I have to ask MixedSignalGirl why she didn't fill me in about this nuance of the rule.

Just some alternative, and better, endings to the 2005 comic from Monday.

Just working on a new archive page.

(update: Okay, well that was fun I guess. It had better have been fun because it's the only thing I did all day Tuesday. Besides work and sleep I mean.)

Which Revenge of the Sith Character are you?

The above illustrates some of the earliest advice my father ever gave me about women. The thinking was that I should be as nice as possible to all of the women I met. That way, even if they themselves weren't interested in me romantically, they'd be sure to know someone who might be. By being nice to all women I stood the best chance of getting a good recommendation.

Make sense, right? Wrong!

That scene may have been perfectly valid in the year 1955, when my father was learning about women as he fought off dinosaurs and stockpiled food for the coming ice age. But now, in 2005, here's what's much more likely to happen:

I'm convinced that this is happening all over the world. Women today (and men too) are no longer looking for the one. They're looking for anyone. If they happen to find their true love and live happily ever after, then they got very lucky. And I hate them.

But most, like about 99.9999999999999% of us, don't get so lucky. We're just getting by, and we're usually pretty sure, deep down, that whoever is currently filling that romantic void in our lives will not be there forever.

So we start looking for the next victim, er, companion even while we're still with the current one. We'll set up a sort of batting order in our heads so we're always ready, so we're never alone.

Women have a much easier time of this than men do. Some women may disagree with that statement, but no man anywhere on Earth would disagree with it.

Men, in general, do get attached to one particular woman. Women, in general, get attached to the idea of being attached. So women generally have a much easier time moving on. Please note that I didn't say easy, I said easier.

I know I'm going to get flamed for this, but I think I'm right. And what's more, I had a long conversation with one of my ex-girlfriends about this the other night. Most of this stuff came from her.

And I know that there are many exceptions for every generalization. That's why it's called that instead of a certainty.

So where am I going with this? Oh, yeah.

The point I wanted to make here was the this could explain that curious phenomenon that men have been puzzling over.

When you see a nice sweet girl with a fucking asshole, it may not actually be because, deep down, women like assholes. It just might be that these jerks are the only ones left that haven't had a "reserved" sign hung around their neck by some other woman.

Read this carefully, guys - it may be important.

If I'm right, then the trick to finding a good woman is not to be too nice. If you're too nice, you're going to end up as somebody's fallback guy and you'll be lucky if you ever even get your finger wet.

Also, you can't be too much of a jerk, for more obvious reasons.

The trick, if I'm right, would be to just be of average niceness, but to be sure and be a prick every now and then too. You're not nice enough to really flash on anybody's radar, and you're not mean enough to get the wrong kind of reputation. Be quiet and mysterious. Be aloof but friendly. Walk that line.

You can be an asshole, but not so much of one that you seem incurable. You can be a nice guy, but not so nice that women start putting you into their batting order.

Hey, this could actually work!

Man I've posted a lot today.

These came in the mail the other day.

Talk about cruel. First they tell me that the show has been cancelled then they go ahead and send the tickets anyway.

Not very cool. Not very cool at all.

Took this picture while eating lunch at Polly's Freeze today.

I didn't say it would be an interesting entry.

Last year on this date I wrote a pretty lengthy entry.

I even posted it for a few minutes, then I deleted it.

This morning I did the same thing.

I haven't forgotten what today is, just like I haven't forgotten that date in May. Or the one in March, or even the one in January.

I do remember these things. It would be easier if I could forget them, but I how could I forget? They're burned into me. Some of them for over two decades now. This one for sixteen years.

I haven't forgotten, but neither do I celebrate them.

Instead I write about them and then keep those writings private.

Do not respond to this. I will never be ready to reopen those wounds.