Found this incomplete document when purging some old files from my computer today.
AGENT CODENAME: KOKOI think this wins the prize for the stupidest thing I've ever started to write. Had I actually completed it, it would have been hundreds of lines long.
MISSION: INDUCEMENT TO ACTION VIA PSYCH. HARASSMENT (STANDARD)
MISSION STATUS: FAILED
15 JUN 2004: Initial assessment of subject vulnerabilities indicates that an adjustment of projected timeline would be feasible. Adjusting estimated mission completion to 1 AUG 2004.
19 JUN 2004: Subject proving to be more amenable to suggestion than previously calculated. Adjusting estimated mission completion to 15 JUL 2004. Requesting additional agents to eliminate secondary target.
20 JUN 2004; Secondary target eliminated. Subject and primary target may be beginning to suspect my presence. Primary objective attainable but subject did not repeat did not achieve.
26 JUN 2004: Mission has suffered a setback. Subject has definitely noticed my presence, and is beginning to actively fight my influence. A frontal assault may no longer be possible. Adjusting estmated mission completion to 15 AUG 2004.
12 JUL 2004: Subject is attempting to veer from defined mission objectives. Will attempt to correct. Requesting additional agents to eliminate secondary target.
24 JUL 2004: Secondary target eliminated. Adjusting estimated mission completion to 1 SEP 2004.
8 AUG 2004: Requesting additional agents to stabilize primary target.
8 AUG 2004: Primary target stabilized. Final objective in sight, but subject continues to fight my influence, and does not approach target. Adusting estimated mission completion to 15 SEP 2004.
According to the date on the file, I started writing this just after my gorilla friend left.