I suppose it's pretty funny, if I think about it. As long as I don't think about for too long, or with too much intensity.

So about a half a second and with passing interest is about right. Any more is fraught with peril.

It's like I was given the keys to my very own time machine. I eagerly jumped in and slammed the lever to the past, as far as it would go. Reality shifted all around me, and *whoosh* back I went.

95,551,200 seconds. That was its limit. What a cheap piece of shit time machine. No wonder it was free.

Fuck!

There I go again. Thinking about it with too much intensity. I hate it when I do that.

Anyway.

I remember being here before. Almost drowning. The pressure. The cold. The almost overwhelming desire to just breathe in these depths and get it all over with. But I also remember that I managed to save myself. I remember how I did it. My feet unexpectedly touched bottom, and I instinctively jumped. Each and every time that I sank so far that I nearly gave up, so far that I would have surely and gladly died, each and every time I instead felt the ground beneath my feet, and I jumped with all my might.

And, eventually, I breathed safely, and I made my way to a paradise of sorts.

Now, suddenly, I find myself back here. Struggling. Drowning again. Pretty funny, like I said.

The water seems deeper, this time. That's probably just my imagination.

But the drowning, that's not all that's funny. Or even most of what's funny.

The really funny part is that far is now near, and near is now far.

It's fucking hilarious, actually. As long as I don't think about it for too long, or with too much intensity. And as long as I don't think about how the surface might be frozen over, so that my jumps might be in vain.