1. Experiencing physical discomfort.
2. Ill at ease; uneasy.
3. Causing anxiety; disquieting
1. Marked for certain death.
2. In danger of eternal punishment of hell.
3. Marked by or promising bad fortune.
I didn't even want to go out tonight.
My body seems to be rejecting alcohol. Last weekend I got quite a hangover from three beers - this weekend I got quite a hangover from just two beers. Clearly something inside me is telling me to stay away.
Just as clearly, I'm not listening, though I hope to change that.
Tonight Rich O's was about as dead as I've ever seen it. This may be in part due to the incredible boringness of the beer board. IPA this, ESB that, not the best arrangement for someone with my tastes.
My first attempt at a beer was an NABC Beak's Best. Something was incredibly wrong with this beer. The bitterness was almost eye-watering. I could only take a couple of sips before returning it.
While I had a Diet Coke to calm my stomach back down I talked with LaptopGirl and her friend FLAZNCGuy. Actually I sat feeling uncomfortable while they talked. After a little while I got the idea that a Belgian ale might make me feel better so I had a Mad Bitch.
I was right - this helped a lot. By the time it was gone I was feeling like myself again so I ordered an NABC Tunnel Vision.
I think I've had this before, but I didn't remember much about it.
I liked it. The pale color scared me to death but this beer proves that you can't always judge a book by its cover.
Anyway, at one point we were joined by NotGeorge and CoffeeDude. I welcomed them both as they gave me something to do besides stare at my feet.
A bit of comedy was introduced when a bachelor party showed up at Rich O's. The poor groom had a bowling ball chained to his leg to symbolize his impending nuptials. Even though the ball and chain was cleary done in jest, I thought LaptopGirl had a good point when she said she'd never want to marry anyone that thought of her that way.
I've clearly screwed something up, and I feel like I'm under a microscope - everything I say or do is being noted and analyzed. People are making unwarranted assumptions about me, and while I suppose in some ways that's better than being ignored, it's still not welcome.
This, combined with my body's new behaviour of punishing me for every drink I take, has led me to the following decision.
I need to lay off.
I need, for a short while at least, to stop going out to the bar every weekend night.
This drastic measure would hopefully accomplish two things.
First, it would allow my body the time to heal from whatever the hell is causing alcohol to affect it so much.
Second, it would let me prove to myself and others that things I've been saying are true. I'm tired of being looked at with concern and pity.
I don't believe in this stuff at all, but an old roommate of mine used to swear by his astrology books, and I remember he'd always tell me how August was my opposition month (I'm a Pisces) and how that opposition would tend to throw one obstacle after another at me. It was up to me to overcome these obstacles.
I'm not sure that "avoiding obstacles" would really count as "overcoming obstacles" but it's the best plan I can think of at the moment. This whole situation sucks and I have nobody to blame but myself.