posted by dave on Tuesday, November 16, 2004 at 3:49 AM in category ramblings

Some time ago I read a good entry in another journal about quirks.

I thought, at the time, that it would make an interesting entry here, but then I figured that it would be stupid.

Well now I'm quite bored, so here goes, my top ten quirks, in no particular order:

1. I hate mayonnaise. Can't stand the stuff. Can't stand the smell, the taste, or even the sight of it. A few years ago I skipped an entire holiday meal because someone had let mayonnaise touch the turkey.

2. Pickle Juice. See the entry for mayonnaise and multiply times ten.

3. If I meet another car at an intersection, and they have the right of way, I will wait until the end of time for them to proceed. I've been known to shut off my car and get out and play cards on my hood before I'd let some idiot who doesn't know any traffic rules out-polite me.

4. If I'm at a bar or a party or wherever, and I get bored, I'll just get up and leave. Only rarely do I even bother to say goodbye to anyone. This is one reason that I normally like to go places alone - no having to wait around for the other person.

5. If you try to make small talk with me within an hour after I wake up you'll be on my shitlist for at least a week. These damn people at work their good mornings and their whattups, they have no idea how much I loathe them in the mornings.

6. If I'm in a group of three or more people, I will almost always shut up and just listen to everyone else. I'm not sure that it's really a quirk, maybe just more of a trait.

7. Unless it's someone I'm really comfortable with, I like to keep a personal space radius of at least five feet at all times. With some people I need ten feet. With some people a thousand miles doesn't seem like enough.

8. I feel most like myself when I'm pining away for someone that's way out of my league.

9. The weirdest thing I ever experienced still freaks me out on a regular basis, and I cannot tell anyone because it was just too damn weird and the only witness was my ex-wife and everybody would figure that I just made the whole thing up.

10. I usually assume that everybody is stupid until they show me otherwise. It's not that I think I'm all that smart, I just think everyone else is a dumbass. I don't count this as a flaw because it doesn't affect how I treat people. Some of my best friends are dumbasses.

(Edited to add a bonus eleventh quirk that someone just reminded me of.)

11. I have this Goldilocks syndrome where I cannot stay comfortable in a bed. I spend my nights wandering between beds and sofas. When I am in a bed I flop around like a dying fish.

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