For my final night in St. Louis, I decided that I wanted to experience Laclede's Landing. So I took a cab back over to the Morgan Street Brewpub.
I took notes.
The bar is packed. The street is packed. I steal a stool from a guy that got stood up and I sit. I order a yummy Morgan Street Irish Stout (16) and a Diet Coke. I know I'll need to pace myself tonight.
The exact same bartenders are working - two hot girls and a neo-nazi and a punk rock guy.
This one bartender with the pigtails reminds me of someone. I don't know who though. Somebody hot I guess.
I didn't pace myself very well today. I think it was that Scotch Ale that messed everything up.
This beer is more roasty than I remember from yesterday. Still yummy though.
I missed HatGirl's party today. That sucks.
I'm ordering some smoked duck in wontons. I don't know why - I guess it just looked intriguing.
One of the hot bartenders asked me what I was writing about. She asked me if I was writing about what I ate and drank, and I said that I was. She then asked if it was because I was on a diet. Ouch.
The guy I stole the stool from is talking on his phone. He's talking about his dick and how he makes it go grocery shopping and check his mailbox for him. It's hilarious.
OMG this duck stuff is delicious!
The last one was burned. Oh well.
DickGuy and LongHairedHottie are talking about tans and the lack thereof. They both, at the same time, pointed at me and said, "Now that guy is white!" So now I'm a fat albino. Great, just great.
The brewer's name is Mark Gottfried, according to LongHairedHottie.
I spent the last 10 minutes telling a guy what he'd just sampled and explaining the differences to him. He then went and asked the bartender the exact same questions. WTF? I'm wearing a shirt that says "Beer is Food" right on the front so that should be a slight indication that I know what I'm talking about.
LongHairedHottie and PigTailHottie just tore ass out of here. They're probably going home to masturbate while fantasizing about my fat albino ass.
OMG The World's Most Lickable Girl is sitting right behind me!
DickGuy just now ended his phone call.
The new hot girl that took over for LongHairedHottie must be new. I'm dying of thirst and she's just standing around looking pretty.
I order a Winter Lager (40) and I move to the outside seating. It might be too dark to write out there.
It seems like it may storm soon. Cool.
I guess I'm in the Morgan Street patio area, not the street seating. It's boring here.
I'm moving to the street seating.
I've been sitting out here two minutes and I've already been interrogated twice. I'm staying until somebody want to sit here and eat.
These streets seemed a lot more rowdy 20 years ago. Nice everybody is nice and tame. I wonder where the woohoos are. I guess it's still kinda early though.
This Winter Lager stuff is fucking yummy!
It's an older crowd here than I would have expected. Some of these people are even older than me if you can believe that.
I feel sorry for these horses that have to pull idiots around all day.
I finally, just now, heard my first "WooHoo!" of the night. About fucking time.
I might vomit now, because this chick walking past me is gross.
Crisis averted. I closed my eyes and thought about MixedSignalGirl, and how we were always supposed to come to St. Louis together, until the skanky gross chick had gone by.
Guess who I miss now.
I'm taking my shit back into the bar because I have to piss.
LongHairedHottie and PigTailHottie are back. They just went to get something to eat. Or so they say. I'm sticking with my masturbation theory.
LongHairedHottie keeps talking to me. She wants me. Can't she tell that there are like three or four other girls ahead of her in the line for my affection?
I wish I was a poet. I could write a poem now.
The gay hockey fans just arrived.
LongHairedHottie has a nice ass, but it's not as nice as the girl's from last night.
The gay hockey guys are woohoos.
Either the lights just dimmed or I'm having a stroke.
Whew! It was the lights.
Under the arch there's a museum. In the museum there's a stuffed bison. The bison is posed with its tail slightly raised, so its asshole is exposed. The taxidermist must have spent a lot of time perfectly preserving that bison's asshole. Maybe my job isn't so bad after all.
I'm cutting myself off. I'm such a good citizen.
I kinda want to stick something into one of PigTailHottie's orifices. I don't really care what I stick, or where I stick it. My toe in her nose? That would be awesome.
I just spent 15 minutes talking to some Romanian chick. I must be the first person that's ever talked to her in her entire life because she wouldn't shut up.
The chicks that were in the bathroom have asked me to joined them at their table outside. I have to stop writing now so I can go sit with hot girls. Woe is me.
I should just stop this entry right here. I had one hot bartender, one Romanian chick, and two hot girls that like to go the bathroom together - all interested in me.
I should just stop writing and let everyone's imaginations run wild.