Tonight is was totally crowded as fuck. There was no good beer on tap. So I stuck to girlie beers.

The highlight of the night, by far, was ThatOneHotGirl.

I wish I'd learned her name. So I'd know what to scream later as I totally ravished her in my dreams.

After ThatOneHotGirl left, Rich O's went back to its regular sausage-fest mode. I became bored very quickly.

I texted HatGirl, but she's sick. I texted NotHideousGirl, but she's totally too smart to get trapped in my web. I emailed RockGirl, but she's 712 miles away.

So I just came home.

It was either that, or do something totally stupid involving someone who's totally better off without me.

Luckily the girlie beers I drank tonight prevented total stupidity.