I have other shit to write about than this. No, really, I do. It's all rattling around in my head. All the time. It's quite distracting, actually.
But it's almost all mean stuff, or at least critical stuff. And I don't want to write anything like that. Not right now. Maybe never. I'm trying to be a good person, here. Get over it.
I didn't watch the show last week. I gather there was some drama with a "save" and some people were happy and some people were pissed. I don't know. Like I said, I didn't watch it.
This week was Elvis songs. So, for me, this week promised to suck. There, I said it. I'm not an Elvis fan. Get over it.
Crystal: She somehow managed to find an Elvis song I'd never heard before. Boring. Minus 10 points for the guitar, and minus 805 points for the fucking backup singers. (-780 points)
Andrew: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. It was a bad Elvis impersonation. He changed it up, but he needed to change it more. A lot more. (50 points)
Tim: Nice song. He did a good job of making it sound current and unlike an Elvis cover. I took off 10 points for the guitar. (65 points)
Lee: WTF is up with all the damn guitars? I thought this was supposed to be a singing competition. I took off 10 for the guitar, but Lee did a really good job with a well-known song. (75 points)
Aaron: A high school musical version of an Elvis classic. I wanted to beat him up and stuff him into a locker. (20 points)
Siobhan or however she spells it: Smoking hot, and a great song. The performance seemed a little night-clubby to me, until the end, when it was great. I gave 25 bonus points for being so hot, then I took 15 of those points away for the damn nose ring. I think she should stop singing and move into the porn industry. (68 points)
Mike: Not even close to my favorite song. This guy is an amazing singer, though. I took off 10 points for the damn guitar, and 5 points for the stupid song choice. Other than those two things, I found no problems whatsoever. (85 points)
Katie: Another song I never heard before. The singing was good. The voice very forgettable. The horn section was waaaaaaaaaaay too loud. (60 points)
Casey: Zzzzzzzzzzzz. I don't care. I really don't. (50 points)