Stolen from gogo.

Generate your own at The Stephen Colbert "On Notice Board" generator page.

I've been working on embedding videos, and I guess it's time to test it in public.

I don't sing, and I don't dance. What I do is shoot pool and drink beer. Since a video of me drinking beer would be quite boring except to my most devout stalkers, here is a video of me shooting pool and almost accomplishing something.

Please let me know if it displays okay. This requires Flash 8 I guess. And probably a broadband connection.

10:30
I'm supposed to be writing something now.

At least that's the excuse I gave the PBDs when I left their little group and moved up here to the island. I've got my notebook open, my pen in hand. Just in case they look, I need to appear to be writing something so they're not offended because I left.

Truth is, though, that I've got nothing.

My mind is so full of shit tonight that it seems to have seized up. Like the proverbial wrench in the works, a certain thought has entered my head and totally jammed everything.

All of my emotions are pitted against each other.

It's a stalemate, so far.

I am so sad that I could sing and dance. I am so happy that I could slit my wrists. I am overflowing with nothingness. I am upside-down, inside-out.

I am Opposite Man.

I curse my blessings while I relish my failings. The silence deafens me and the darkness blinds me. I am dizzy from the stillness. I am calmed by the chaos.

This gray place has erupted in colors, and I am repulsed by the beauty that suddenly surrounds me.

The die has been cast, and its flight is my world. When it lands, when it stops, then so do I.

It will be horribly wonderful.

I will love it.

And I will hate that I love it.

Anyway, tonight Rich O's was only about half-full. This was fantastic, especially after last night. I sat on the loveseat and enjoyed my Piraat (175) and talked with some dude that claimed to know me although I didn't have the foggiest idea who he might be. It sucks getting old.

After a bit, the stranger in the throne left so I moved there. A bunch of PBDs joined me and we spent the next couple of hours talking about nothing much.

My second beer was an NABC Community Dark (220). I had to pace myself, see, after the 10.5% Piraat.

I talked to the PBDs, and I talked to SassyGirl on the phone for a bit. It was a nice and calm and relaxing night.

I hated it.

My third beer was supposed to be a Hoegaarden, but they were out, so I had a yummy Weihenstephaner (1451) instead.

They closed up early. Before 11:00 even. So I went to White Castle and then came home.

Actually, London is not calling, but that wouldn't nearly as clever a subject.

London is not even leaving any comments.

C'mon, London!

I don't bite.

Got up at the butt crack of dawn this morning because either my doorbell rang or I dreamed that it rang. I'm guessing the latter because there was nobody at my door.

Anyway, I'm up and so now I'm logged in to work monitoring the last few remaining backup jobs from last night. Pretty fucking exciting, I know.

Last night Rich O's was crowded as fuck. It was standing room only in the place. It hasn't been that bad for a very long time.

Plus, it was about 90% strangers.

I sat at the kiddie table with one such stranger and ordered a Weihenstephaner Hefeweissbier (1411) and talked with GlassesGirl and LibertyGirl for a bit. Then the throne opened up so I moved there.

For the longest time I just sat and drank my beer and talked with the strangers sitting around me and texted RockGirl. I don't know where they all came from. One guy suggested that maybe IUS had started back up. That's as good a theory as any I suppose.

My second beer was another Weihenstephaner (1431).

As the night wound down GlassesGirl and MusicalHippieDude and WomanRepellant came and joined me in the living room.

My last beer was an NABC Artemsia (190).

There was something else. What was it?

Oh yeah.

I wasn't going to write about it until I'd talked to MixedSignalGirl. Plus it wasn't really anyone's business. Well I talked to her finally on Thursday and told her what was going on. She didn't seem nearly as excited as I'd hoped. Timing is everything I suppose.

Tonight was a good night.

And I'll tell you why.

Because it made sense.

It's as simple as that.

Tonight was the first night in a very very very very very long time during which everything actually added up to the sum of my demeanor.

Tonight, it wasn't the past's broken promises that determined my mood. It wasn't the future's faded dreams that guided my emotions. Tonight, both the past and the future were irrelevant to the stark reality of the here and the now.

There was no rummaging through the cluttered attic of my mind to find the right excuse to be happy. There were no dates reminding me of arbitrary anniversaries to make me sad. There were no ghosts haunting my every thought and tainting my every emotion.

Tonight, I got to feel the way I was supposed to feel. The way anyone would feel in these same circumstances.

It doesn't matter at all how I actually felt when I came home tonight. Sad, happy, pissed, irritated, melancholy, anxious, blissful - it doesn't matter in the least.

What matters is that tonight, for the first time in a very long time, I got to be an ordinary person. An ordinary person experiencing extraordinary circumstances, and reacting to them in an ordinary way.

Tonight, for the first time in a very long time, I got to be sane.

My life has become an endless séance.

Which is funny, because I'm the one who's dead.

(I want to expand on this, but not right now.)

Okay, this is funny.

Not.

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